30 January 2011

How to get a Bus Pass made without losing your sanity

6 Easy Steps for the General Public


Step 1:
Believe in Fate. Fate, not fate. Pray to the dread goddess before venturing forth. Believe, too, in Murphy, the Son Immaculate of the All-Knowing Mother. Hail Fate, Hail Murphy – Hail the Laws!

Step 2:
Hope for the assistance of assistants. Paan khaaye affcar humare. Hope the affcar is in office, hope the Principal is in office, hope the office is still the office…hope!

Step 3:
Be prepared. Be alert. Be ready to sacrifice. Give up, let go, and march on to glory and verification!

Step 4:
Seasons in the Sun? Rotting in the Sun. Carry the longest tome you have or upload the most time consuming playlist onto your khilona. You will have moved seven spaces up and five spaces back by evening.

Step 5:
Be smart. Think smart. Get going to another centre. Feel happy about yourself; trust Fate – and so see your plans ruined. Murphy stands inviolate!

Step 6:
Pour the Goddess libations. Promise her well. Promise yourself too – prove Murphy bastard. Go again, arise, go! Fate rewards the persistent, ultimately damns her Son. Be thou the Spirit, be victorious! Hum honge kamyaab, hum ho gaye kamyaab. Now, celebrate: look down upon the losers late as you cruise past them on a DTC.

5 comments:

rahul said...

U are a born genius Anubhav and have enough traits to be bigger than Shakespeare himself. Kudos to you for thinking all this stuff. I can understand the pain we go for getting a bus pass. Keep up the good work...and would always look forward to such stuff in the future

AP said...

Oh no, not at all! You do exaggerate here, Mishra Saab!

Creation said...

Chhee.
That's all.
Chhee.

Sunny said...

So true ,uve gotto get your antennae up when in the line of unending length.I did manage a pass in my DU times,But now-a days,I've got no strength left to get one,did try once ,but took a Rs10 ticket back to college instead on seeing that mob,the mob of angry disgruntled dissatisfied young men & women (sorry,women & men) jostling for that one card,no siree,I DO have my sanity to take keep !!

AP said...

Ah well, such is life, old boy!